A little humour from the archives

Found something sent to me by an old Gallente friend, one Monty Tomasi. It was one of the last things he mentioned before he went planetside. Wonder how he's doing these days?

HOW MANY MEMBERS OF THE CALDARI STATE DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?

1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed;
2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs to be changed;
3. One to blame the Gallente for burning out the light bulb;
4. One to arrange the invasion of a planet rumored to have a secret stockpile of light bulbs;
5. One to give a billion ISK no-bid contract to an internal megacorp for a new light bulb, but they do not get it done;
6. One to arrange a photograph of the CEO, dressed as a janitor, standing on a step ladder under the banner: Light Bulb Change Accomplished;
7. One administration insider to resign and write a book documenting in detail how the State's shadowy Board of Directors were literally in the dark;
8. One to viciously attack #7 and make sure he never works again;
9. One to make sure light bulb change plan is accomplished using military forces, along with a massive doomsday weapon campaign of those opposed to the State's plan;
10. One to confuse Caldari about the difference between screwing a light bulb and screwing the State;
11. One to send out media spin about how the light bulb changing campaign has been accomplished perfectly, (even though bulb is still burned out);
12. One to buy off Gallente reporters who will print positive stories about the State's light bulb changing expertise and success stories using tax ISK;
13. One to take charge of starting a campaign to infiltrate groups such as the Sisters of Eve suspected of being terrorists due to their alternative energy or energy saving stance;
14. One to import a cheaper light bulb from the Minmatar Republic, while exporting all high paying union light bulb manufacturing State jobs over to the underpaid Republic;
15. One to announce that the State is no longer subject to any international light bulb treaties or laws, while the megacorp Directors are still saying "The State obeys all laws";
16. One to announce that light bulb torture is OK, in order to extract confessions from them;
17- 29. Twelve govt. dept. cronies to campaign on Holovid and at rallies on how the State's megacorps have had a strong light-bulb-changing policy all along;30. One to announce the economy is getting better and better due to the State's light bulb policy, meanwhile poverty rate doubles and deficit increases 1,000%;
31. The governing megacorps give out high paying light bulb changing jobs and grants to cronies and fundamentalist Amarr who supported the campaign;
32. Nugoeihuvi Corporation gives extensive coverage of how swell everything is in the light bulb changing world of the State.